Sunday Wisdom from the Daredevil Book for Cats

Okay - this is going to be the last week on Sunday wisdom from Prince Cuddles. I have given you enough teasers from the book - you will just have to get your humans to go out and buy it for you.

This week, I wanted to leave Prince Cuddles on a high and we will be looking at Famous Cat Lovers in history.

Many famous composers exploited cats remorselessly in their search for a tune you could hum.
Frederick Chopin took notes as his cat danced across the keyboard of his piano. It was the first run through of the "Cat Waltz".
Scarlatti's kitty, Pulcinella, did a turn around the harpsichord to produce the Fugue in G Minor, L499, aka the "Cat's Fugue".
But did either animal get royalties from these projects? Not on your nelly. Neither moggy saw a single red cent.

I have really enjoyed these Sunday sessions with Prince Cuddles and the Daredevil Book for Cats. I hope you have too!


Nick Griffiths website - author of The Daredevil Book for Cats

Sunday Wisdom from the Daredevil Book for Cats

What to do if you climb a tree by mistake....

According to Prince Cuddles you must:

1. Mewl as if your life depends on it (since it does)

2. Once you have attracted the dear old lady with a bag's attention - avoid youths in hoods, who will only throw stones and find your predicament briefly hilarious, before slouching off to the nearest shopping centre - keep mewling!

3. She will call up at you, somehow imagining that you understand human. "Are you stuck?", "Come on kitty, you can climb down" - that type of nonsense. Ignore her and hope she locates someone more useful to ask for their help.

4. When the more useful person arrives, they will both stare up at you, probably pointing. Others may gather with them. It's alright, they know you're there now. You can safely revert to ignoring them as if they are dirt.

5. You may hear sirens - a good sign - or a fire engine might just turn up unannounced. This is the Fire Service. They have ladders, which is just the job.

6. A fireman will climb a very high ladder, risking life and limb to reach you. Try to scratch his eyes out when he gets there (It's only fair).

7. After you have diegned to be rescued, the fireman will descend the ladder. Once safely on the ground, struggle out of his arms and waltz off as if you've been unnecessarily inconvenienced.

8. Climb the tree again.


Hey thanks for that Prince Cuddles. Good advice for a bit of fun once again.

But in Australia, the standard operating procedure for the fire brigade in getting kitties down from trees is to turn the hose on them - can you imagine????? How horrifying.



Nick Griffiths website - author of The Daredevil Book for Cats

Sunday Wisdom from the Daredevil Book of Cats

According to Prince Cuddles, he thinks cats are not fussy eaters:

It's a spiteful myth that cats are excessively choosy. In fact, they will eat most things a reasonable human servant will set in front of them including:

* Anything cooked by Gordon Ramsay

* Or Marco Pierre White

* Or Mario Batali

* But not that Jamie Oliver bloke, his outsized tongue puts me off

* Oysters? Maybe, but only with a dash of fresh lime and a hint of tabasco

* Truffles? Nah, too mushroomy

* Pate de foie gras? Bleugh, rubbish, I wouldn't feed that to a dog!

* Exquisite shashimi prepared by Japan's most celebrated chef. You're kidding! If I want a teensy weensy portion of masterfully sliced fish - I'll ask for it!



Awesome list Prince Cuddles. Everyone knows my favourite is mince - of any kind - beef, lamb, chicken, veal and kangaroo!


Nick Griffiths website - author of The Daredevil Book for Cats

Sunday Wisdom from the Daredevil Book for Cats

Prince Cuddles talks about famous cat-haters in history - how could anyone hate cats?
According to Prince Cuddles:

Ghenghis Khan, Alexander the Great, Julius Caesar, Napoleon, Mussolini and Hitler. What links them?
Yes, I know they killed thousands of humans, but the answer I am looking for is that each of them had ailurophobia - a posh Greek word for fear of cats. None of them could bear to be in our regal presence. Small animals suffer from the same mental illness......

Thanks Prince Cuddles - we like interesting trivia like this.....



Nick Griffiths website - author of The Daredevil Book for Cats

Sunday Wisdom from the Daredevil Book for Cats

Lets hear some more wisdom from Prince Cuddles:

How to wheedle around your human servants

1. Lie around doing naff all, hoping that by some miracle of ESP they realise what you are after and produce it. (This rarely works, which doesn't stop me from trying it).

2. Look at them with your cutest expression.

3. Add purring to 2 (above).

4. Paw at them, making insistent 'miaow' sounds.

5. Rub yourself around their ankles. (I find this degrading).

6. Start moaning. Something like this: 'Riaow, riaow, mrrw, riaow, RAOW, RAOW!'.

7. Bite their ankles.

8. Take the goldfish hostage.

9. Eat the goldfish.

10. Take the children hostage.

11. Let the children go (you were only bluffing) but set fire to the kitchen.

12. While the kitchen burns, call in a nuclear air strike.

13. Unlucky for some! Having destroyed their entire town/city, become the head of a James Bond-style world domination organisation, buy a very big laser, plant it on the moon and hold all of planet Earth for ransom.

Um - thanks Prince Cuddles - this is exreme advice! He reckons that should do it - get your own way I think he means - otherwise, if they still haven't topped up your water dish, Prince Cuddles recommends changing families......

I think I might have to read ahead to see if all Prince Cuddles' advice is this violent and involves world domination!



Nick Griffiths website - author of The Daredevil Book for Cats

Sunday Wisdom from the Daredevil Book for Cats

This Week we will be looking at the 10 Commandments of Cats:




1. Feel free to covet your neighbouring cat's wife. And their house and their Kitty Chunks for that matter.

2. Its okay to kill, provided the creature you are killing is smaller than you and defenceless. No sense in taking risks.

3. If a human offers you leftover kebab - leave it. Honestly, I always have terrible trouble the next morning.

4. Never explain. We are meant to be mysterious.

5. Learn your spellings. Idol = Bad. Idle = Good.

6. Commit adultery. If anyone challenges your morals, tell them there aren't enough cats to go around according to a recent survey. (If they ask which survey, run away.)

7. Never repay a favour. Giving should be its own reward.

8. If a job is worth doing, its worth getting someone else to do it.

9. Always get into fights. No idea why.

10. There is only one god. Thats you my good friend.


Thanks again Prince Cuddles. A good benchmark for us all to follow.

Nick Griffiths website - author of The Daredevil Book for Cats

Sunday Wisdom from the Daredevil Book for Cats

Here is some more wisdom from Prince Cuddles (I didn't turn the page over last week so this is a continuation.....):

More on the Cat Doctrine:

1. If we wanted to be disturbed, we would hang "Do Disturb" Notices on our noses. You will notice that we do not.

2. However, we are not arrogant creatures - well only a little bit - so in payment for our human servants efforts, we sometimes allow ourselves to be scratched, hugged, fed, watered and generally mollycoddled. That is why we are great.

3. Mice and small birds are not our friends.


Thanks again Prince Cuddles for this weeks observations.


Nick Griffiths website - author of The Daredevil Book for Cats

The Daredevil Book for Cats

I got given this book from Kat & Steve. I am finding it fascinating and thought I would share some of Prince Cuddles' wisdom with you.

The Cat Doctrine according to Prince Cuddles:

1. Just as Earth revolves around the Sun, so the world revolves around us. That is how it should be.

2. If a job is worth doing, it's worth being done by someone else. (Our human servants more often than not).

3. We are great, and being great is exhausting work. Thus we should lounge around as often and for as long as possible. It's only reasonable.

Thanks Prince Cuddles - this is a doctrine that we can all live by.



For more information on this book, go to the authors website by clicking below:

Nick Griffiths website - author of The Daredevil Book for Cats